The earth, in the future
Sometime in the year 3000
Will stop revolving
Thanks to a massive population surge
The surface will get too heavy
And it’ll just stop
Stop stop stop

The sun will be stuck on one side
And everything there will be burnt
All crispified
And the moon will be stuck on the other
And everything there will be
In perpetual night for all eternity

A sudden nuclear war
Causing the second great depression
Shall end life on the surface
As we know it
A plant? What’s that?
A telephone? TV? Internet?
The Dark Ages shall reign supreme
Again

Humans shall mutate to suit their new conditions
‘Cause we, like parasites
Shall stick around
Oh ho, you can’t get rid of us that easily!
We’ll all live underground
In giant underground cities
And live off rats and lizards and bugs
All mutated too, of course

Those insane ones who do venture to the surface
(with bottles of oxygen hydrocleanikoxide -
don’t bother saying it, fifty-two cents per bottle)
Will find their once proud cities
In ruins
Skyscrapers, man made to touch the skies
Will lie forlorn in shambles   
Frequented by those haggard souls
Who for the life of them
Have nothing better to do
(other than fight for their survival every single day)

Politics too shall survive (unfortunately)
And we shall continue to live in sections
Regional, like the countries beforehand
In our cities underground
And our president man will say
“This situation was not my fault
I didn’t start the nuclear war
Or allow the population boom
It was them, all them.” And point the finger
At the president of another group
Who’ll deny it, and point the finger
And there’ll be fights again
Until all the blame will eventually be placed
On the sun and earth
Who were innocent in the first place

And that’s the way of the year 3000
A future bright and bold
Sitting just around the bend
And waiting for us to
Lend a hand